I was in my first trimester and I thought that I knew better than every other pregnant woman. I didn’t realise it at the time, but I was smug. I was suffering with Smug First Trimester Syndrome. Now, in the final stages of my pregnancy, I recognise the errors of my way. Here are some things that I wish I hadn’t said…
- NOTHING will stop me from shaving my legs
Why wouldn’t you want to maintain meticulous pins at all times, particularly with more people than ever spending time down that end of your body? There’s been a gradual decline from doing the bits I can see (I’ve got smooooooth knees), guessing (which caused quite a few cuts) to becoming exhausted at the prospect.
- I won’t complain
“You’re pregnant, not ill”… a mantra you’d often find me muttering. Then I discovered pregnancy insomnia, the inability to find a comfortable position and a baby lying transverse. Now I feel like I’ve earned my right to complain.
- I’ll still have nights out
I would rather stab rusty needles in my eyes than spend hours getting ready, squeezing myself like a sausage into a half-decent outfit and staying out way past my bedtime (9pm… rock and roll). Hibernation is in full flow.
- I’ll work until the baby is born
Now, I know that my situation was a bit different with being on reduced activity, but even if I’d had a completely normal pregnancy, the thought of not sleeping all night and then going to work for a full day without crawling under my desk for a nap seems IMPOSSIBLE. Plus, how would I find time to do all of the clearing out that’s waited years but I now have the urge to fix immediately.
- I’m never getting someone to put my shoes on for me
Asking for help or walking around town bare-footed… there seems to be no competition. Flip flops in May don’t seem so bad now!
- The first Trimester is the hardest
Yeah right ?
- We won’t need a cleaner when I’m on maternity
Don’t get me wrong – everything above waist height is cleaner than it’s ever been… but anything below that doesn’t exist now in my world.
- I’m not going to get hormonal
I can laugh and cry at the same time. How is that even possible?
Did you ever say things you looked back to regret? Tell me I’m not alone here. In other news, I just walked down the street with my skirt tucked into my knickers. Somehow when I discovered this, I reasoned it as not being that bad at the prospect that I’m going to be having lots of strangers seeing many worse things over the coming weeks…