Nobody tells you that for the first four months of your baby’s life, they’re pretty grumpy little buggers. Well wishers, busy bodies and the power of Google will tell you that it’s a growth spurt and you’ve only got a couple of days left until your happy little chappy returns. What they don’t tell you is that you only have 2 days to make the most of it before they’re onto some sort of development leap or the like.
Then when you’re done with the last growth spurt and right before you hit teething, there’s sleep regression. Gone are the days where your baby would sleep at the drop of a hat. Where you once served as reassurance to your other friends that you really could have a baby and continue with life as usual, like some kind of mythical magical unicorn creature, you find yourself rocking, cradling, feeding, shhhh’ing and yet still your baby’s eyelids open as soon as they’re flat. A two hour sleep period is considered progress and other mothers around you remind you to make the most of these precious moments. Usually those smug b*stards are getting 8 hours a night.
Our barista now knows us on first name terms… Gradually upping our caffeine intake with additional shots by the day. He’s started to get a bit sheepish of late, we’re worried he’s thinking about going cold turkey on us but we keep filling in customer satisfaction surveys in the hope of keeping him sweet.
Of course these phases pass, you can be found reminding yourself of this over and over. When it does, I’d put money on you being told you’re so lucky to have such a happy baby. FFS.
I love my mini human, really I do, but it won’t be long until there is a world shortage of under eye concealer.
How are you finding motherhood? Do you have any tips or advice? Any gems of insight from distant relatives that have had you hitting the drinks cabinet? I’d love to hear from you.
Anyway, must dash, the baby’s awake 🙄😂